Consumer Manifesto Agitated Shopper

Consumer Manifesto

To all the corporations, brands and marketing agencies:

Stop selling.
Stop telling.
Stop showing.

We’ve seen it all. We are your potential customers and we are sick of all this shit.

Stop tricking us into buying things we don’t want or need!

Stop telling us what we care about. Just overall, stop assuming about things you think we care about.

Stop forcing your corporate “mission statements”. We don’t care about your “hip corporate culture” and that you have a foosball table in your cafeteria in expensive office downtown.

We don’t!

You can’t fool us into buying your “environmentally conscious” business model. We don’t buy your your “ethical” products and the “corporate responsibility” drivel. All of which you shove down our throats with your advertising.

Stop it!

Stop making idiots out of us!

We see your profit-oriented political agenda straight through. We see your manipulative marketing, we see your fake “care”.

We don’t want to be coerced into buying your products with psychological manipulations and high-conversion advertising tactics.

We don’t want to be your sales reports statistics.

We are humans and not a number in our sales funnel.

But we want something else from you.

We want answers to OUR problems.

We want you to understand our real issues, our hidden pains and our burning desires.

But before you can even start to provide answers to them… please, LISTEN!

Listen to us!

And by listen, we don’t mean your fabricated surveys created by tone deaf consultants. We don’t mean your bribed reviews. We don’t mean your optionally-but-feels-kind-of-forced feedback… no!

Listen to us on our turf.

Come to our grounds. Come to our social media pages. Follow us on, just pick whatever platform, we are everywhere.

Listen to us where we hang out.

Listen to what we talk about, engage and consume on those platforms.

Listen to us. Have people committed to listening on your marketing team.

We want to read your sales copy and feel that a human being wrote it. We want to see that person’s emotions….

But most importantly we want that person to speak directly to us, not about us.

We want to have a conversation with our brands.

We want someone on our side inside of your company. Someone who pays attention to what we say, often anonymously and in “private”.

Because, frankly, we don’t have a shortage of supply. There are plenty of “yous” out there. Don’t kid yourself, market has saturated by vendors and brands in nearly every industry and its niche.

We want you to step down, step over, cross the invisible barrier “us vs them” and, look at OUR problems together with us… and say,

“gheez!… This what you’re dealing with… this sucks so much! Tell me more … and maybe, we can fix it together!”

We want you to resist the pressure of shareholders, investors and out of tune marketing firms.

They’ve lost touch with your true “Why’s”. Because, remember, one time you were a little business. You cared about every single person that walked through your physical or virtual door. Remember? That time we wanted to do business with you because we interacted with human?

Yeah, bring a little bit of that back.

In return we’ll be your fans. Your loyalists. Your brand advocate. Your “defend-till-blue-in-the-face” fanatic to anyone who dares to not see your true value.

We will. We promise.

But first, come to our side. Let’s work together.

~ Your Future Potential Loyal Customers

Leave a Comment!